Indiana Jones AndThe Timepiece of Samsara
by Gluten-Free FanFiction
Summary: Indiana Jones share a beautiful adventure with his new friend, Flava Flav, in this little-known adventure. George Lucas was gonna make it, but he thought it was too steamy...


Indiana Jones and the Timepiece of Samsara

Many of the adventures of Indiana Jones are cataloged and shown to all with no interest of cover-up. This story, however, is one that never saw the light of day. Until now...

One day Indiana Jones was in a tomb, finding a thing. The thing this time was the Topaz salamander of Tunisia. After much exploration, Indiana Jones found it. He was about to go back to his plane when, for some reason, he thought, "I really could use a drink. Aren't there any bars around here?" He found one, and inside he had a drink and glistened to a nearby conversation. "But the timepiece is lost forever!" one fat man said. "No!" said another fat man. "I tell you it is in America! The newspapers do not lie." Indiana Jones then heard a lot of paper shuffling, followed by a sharp gasp from one of the fat men, not unlike the hiss of a cat, but inhaling, not exhaling. "So it is true! The priceless timepiece of Samsara Is going to be part of the American parade to honor their greatest leader, President Linkin!" This is all that Indiana Jones had to hear. Next thing you know his airplane was on it's way to U.S.A.

Once he landed, Indiana Jones got the first newspapers he could find to find when the parade would start. "Perfect! I still have thirty minutes to get there!" Indiana Jones got on his motorcycle and drove fast.

It was five minutes before the parade was to start, Flava Flav was starting to have cold feet. "What if they don't like me?" He thought to himself. "What if they think I don't got the flava no more?"

"you'll do fine." a large, booming voice said behind him. Flava Flav whipped around. "Chuck D! Just when I needed some advice. What do I do?" "Just do what you do when you want to do what you do. He said, plainly. "Thanks!" said Flava Flav, genuinely. The parade was starting, so Flava Flav readied his big clock and sat in his thrown-styled float to honor Precedent Linkin. Chuck D ascended.

Indiana Jones came roaring to the sidelines of the parade hardly seconds to spare. "i made it just in time. Now I will find that timepiece," he said, eyeing out the crowd. Indiana Jones had had much experience with bad guys, and he knew they couldn't be that far from this place. The parade had begun, the first float rolled in, and on it, something unexpected for Indiana Jones.

"Who is that?" He thought. "no matter, that must be the Time peice of Samsara!" he yelled, jumping over the barrier between him and the floats. At this time, three men brandished guns and started running toward the floats as well. Indiana Jones saw them immediately and ran toward the float for cover. Flava Flav was scared, and just saw the guns, so was more scared. One of the men started to climb the float, which made Flava Flav scream. This made Indiana Jones mad. Ha ran toward one of the men and punched the gun out of his hands, then picked up the gun and shot the other one before he could even shoot his gun! Things were getting crazy. The third man killed the float driver and so the float was going out of control. Flava Flav had to leap to the ground before the float crashed into a crowd of people. They all died.

Indiana Jones fought with the last man for what seamed like an peternity, then, finally, he knocked him out. Finally, he got the bad guys, thought Indiana Jones. Then suddenly, a sharp noise and a sharper pain enter Indiana Jones' body. The first bad guy wasn't dead, and shot Indiana Jones. Flava Flav got one of the guns and shot him. "Aaaaagghh." said Indiana Jones. "Are you OK? That looks bad" said Flava Flav, grasping Indiana Jones' wounded leg. "I am now." Said Indiana Jones. Indiana Jones' heart jumped. Maybe it was the pain in his leg blinding his judgment, but this Flava Flav was one fine piece of ass.

"We need to get you to a doctor, man." said Flava Flav. The Indiana Jones bled was bleeding very profusely at this point. "we dont't have time for that! I need to find the Timepiece of Samsara!" "well we have to do something." said Flava Flav. "I know! I'll suck the bullet out and bandage the wound up!" "OK just make it quick." said Indiana Jones, impatiantley. as Flava Flav pressed his sultry lips against Indiana jones' thigh, Indiana Jones become uncomfortable. It had been many years since he last saw Mariah, and was confused feelings. As Flava Flav begun to suck the bullet out, Indiana Jones felt, pain, but also safe because Flava Flav wass safe. "oh My, thet's a lot of blood coming out" said Flava Flav. His pants were now soaked with glistening blood, and Flava Flav's hand were coated with it as he grasped Indiana Jones' thigh to apply pressure. Indiana jones just smiled, reassuringly.

"finally! Got it out!" grunted Flava Flav, a deformed bullet clenched in his now-bloodstained grill. Indiana Jones sighed a sigh of relief. "now to bandage you up. Looks like you lost a lot of blood" said Flava Flav. 'Good thing too', thought Indian Jones. "There! Done. So what what that you were saying about the timepiece of samurais?" asked Flava Flav. " oh yes," Indiana Jones finally spoke up. The timepiece of Samsara. I have to find it and take it to a museum before those bad people get to it first. "But where could it be?" Flava Flav asked. " I don't yet know." Indiana Jones stood up, then stumbled. His leg is still weak. Flava Flav hopped up to help him, his clock necklace jingling from the sudden movement. "hold on I got you" said Flava Flav. Indiana Jones' eyes widened as he noticed the clock arounf Flava Flav's neck as he helped him support himself." where did you get that clock?" he said, surprised. "This? I've had it on me since as long as I can remember." "I think that is the toimepiece of Samsara." said Indiana Jones. "I never Thought!" said Flava Flav. "lets go to a museum right now away." both of them walked slowly to the motorcycle the indiana Jones drove to this place with, and get on. Indiana Jones stopped, and listened to the air. "What is it?" Flava Flav Inquired. Indiana jones paused for a moment, then finally said it. "Trouble."

No sooner than He said that, the Armored car carrying seven to fifteen bad men drove around the corner. "hold on tight!" he said, secretly hoping he would hug him from behind as close as he could. Flava Flav jumped on the bike and wrapped his arms around Indiana Jones' waist, trusting fully in Indiana Jones' skills. They started to drive as fast as they could toward the armored car. "What are you doing!?"yelled Flava flav, startled. "Losing these guys said Indiana Jones. "I trust You." said Flava Flav, at this point he knew Indina Jones can do anything. The motor cycle careened toward the armored car, and as they closed in on one a nother, A man came out of the top with an AK-47 aimed right at the Motorcycle. He shoot at it, and with cat-like reflexes Indiana jones swerved out of the way of all of the bullets of the gun. Now was the time for Indiana Jones plan to work. "Hang on Tight!" He said. "I trust you Indiana Jones!" yelled Flava Flav. Indiana Jones jerked the bike then tilted sideways to start drifting right in front of the armored care. They both slide under the car and within a millisecond were now going the opposite direction of the badguys after having been run over by them. "that will only buy us time" Said Indiana Jones. "Let's Get Going."

They raced to the museum. When they got off the bike, Indiana Jones was still a bit wobbly, but could manage. The two entered the building, were Indiana Jones explained the importance of the Timepiece Of Samsara. After some discussion, the curator tuned to Flava Flav and said "The museum would love to purchase that item around your neck, Mr. Flav." "No" said Flava Flav. "You can have it. I have had enough adventure in the last hour to pay for it." Flava Flav handed over his clock, and the Timepiece of Samsara was finally in trustworthy hands.

Flava Flav turned to Indiana Jones. "Indiana Jones, through we've only been together for a shirt time, we have gone though so much. This time for me was very spacial." Indiana Jones looked worried, he was afraid, though also excited, about what Flava Flav might say next. "Do you maybe want to be closer than just friends Indiana Jones?" Indiana Jones' heart jumped like a pancake out of a pan. "Yes, I would like that very much." Indiana Jones said finally, having recovered from Flava Flav's admittance.

What followed was a passionate kiss between the two, right in front of the curator, who by this time was feeling extraordinarily uncomfortable. Once Indiana Jones had finally noticed the curator, he cut the kiss short. "Sorry to keep you waiting. Here's my contact information, we can discuss the details on the timepiece Friday." the curator took a second to respond, as if his conscious mind had to travel some distance to return to his body. "Oh, um, yes! Indeed. I will see you then. Ta-ta." Indiana Jones looked back at Flava Flav. "What do you say we get a room and do some exploring of our own?" He said with a grin. Flava Flav giggled.

This is the end of the written story, but not necessarily the tale. On that night, it is said by many of the people that throughout the town could be heard a mighty "Yeeeeaaahh Booooooiiiii!" from the Flexwood Inn, located next to the museum. It is assumed they lived happily ever after.

THE END


End file.
